The other day in an interview I was giving, I was asked to give someone just going into leadership a piece of wisdom. While effective leadership can never be boiled down to one or two traits, there are certainly some non-negotiables. Fostering effective relationships with your staff is one of those non-negotiables. A person may possess some great management skills but without relational abilities, effective leadership is fleeting at best. Simply put, you can’t be the best version of leadership by being a jerk.
The unfortunate part in today’s society is that we have so many “leaders” especially in the political arenas that contradict that sentiment. While they may be “deemed leaders” the more important question is “Are they effective?” I would hesitate to agree that because they’ve simply been elected, they are effective. Instead, I might suggest that our overall leadership pool in politics is especially shallow and sometimes there just isn’t any desirable choice.
The bottom line is that great leaders are great people. They foster strong relationships with their people by acting with fairness, kindness, and empathy. Integrity is always used as a descriptor of the great leader. Wow…wouldn’t that be something if our politicians exercised integrity? Their transparency, honesty and vulnerability build trust from the inside out. And trust is essential!
Today’s organizations especially in the field of education must be adaptive. Changing societies, diverse populations and global connections are forcing educational staff to do things differently in order to address the needs to the 21st century learner. With the status quo being unacceptable going forward, leaders are being asked to transform systems, schools and classrooms. Demanding change may bring compliance, but it is commitment that great leaders desire. Transformative change can only come about when strong trusting relationships are in place, and it always starts with the leader.
When you look at the visual above (courtesy of Franklin Covey), the behaviours of high trust leaders are established through a concentrated effort of building effective relationships. No where is being a jerk a trust building behaviour!
In Patrick Lencioni’s book, “The Five Dysfunctions of Team” the absence of trust is the base level dysfunction. Without trust you cannot go any further as a team. Often those who are not relational have this belief that fostering effective relationships is contrary to making tough decisions or having difficult conversations. I refer back to Lencioni’s work in that the second dysfunction is a fear of conflict. When trust is established and relationships are strong, conflict can naturally occur. Conflict isn’t about personal attacks (that’s what a jerk does), but about debating ideas, brainstorming solutions and challenging perspectives. But conflict, is always done in a respectful manner.
Leaders, in all avenues of society, need to fully understand the importance of building those strong relationships in their organizations. Being a jerk may get you elected but it certainly won’t create a leadership legacy!
