The other night, I watched the US Presidential debate and like most sane people, I was pretty dismayed by the entire debacle. It was certainly a low point if not the lowest for American politics. There wasn’t a simple stretch of the truth, instead, lies spewed and the decorum exhibited was deplorable! What we watched wasn’t a debate, it was a street fight. Radicals on either side may have seen something positive but for most people sitting and listening, nothing of substance around true policy or direction was shared.

If I was an American, I’d probably align more with the Republican mandate but there is absolutely no way that I could vote for Donald Trump. He is an ego maniac and a bully. More importantly, he has caused more division in the country (by not denouncing white supremacy or supporting peaceful protests) than any other president in recent history. The man is as far away from a true leader as can be humanly possible. Being humble is not likely in his vocabulary.

So what has that to do with Canada? Well, over the past number of years, we’ve started to head down the road of mud slinging politics. An acquaintance of mine grew up in Ottawa years ago and he and his buddies would head to Parliament often to watched the proceedings. He would tell you that the decorum during that time was classy. Debates were courteous, questions were tough but there was a lack of drama. In other words, politicians acted like the leaders they were elected to be.

During the beginning stage of the pandemic, I was proud of the majority of our Canadian politicians as they put the country first and party politics second. We were in a crisis and it was time to come together. That may be waning slightly now because it likely time to start thinking about checks and balances within this crisis. However, the bottom line is that disagreement on the floor should be done with integrity. Cat calls, rude comments, stunts and interruptions are not what we as a public should accept as proper behaviour by our politicians…no matter the party!

Living in Alberta, I’m more aware of our own provincial politics. I’ve been required to attend the legislature on a number of occasions and given my history, I would not send students to watch our provincial politicians during debate. There is not a classroom in the province run by a good teacher that behaves as poorly as many of our MLAs. This is not about picking sides because I’ve witnessed rude and obnoxious behaviour on both sides of the floor over many terms. Where is the class? Where is the appropriate decorum? Where are the respectful interactions? It seems that those characteristics of years gone by are few and far between and “staging” seems to be more important than meaningful discourse.

Unfortunately it is not only being seen in the Legislature but through social media as well. Politicians (from all sides) are flinging personal insults, making rude comments and in the end perpetuating a belief that nothing is ever good on one side or the other. Social media can be a powerful tool but it can also be a devastating weapon when used improperly. I think all politicians need to do a gut check to see if their behaviours or their comments in person or through social media are leading them more toward Trump style politics and if so…cease and desist!

I think our federal and provincial politicians should be applauded for responding to a call to serve. But note it is a call to serve not be served and a call to be humble and not arrogant. They deserve our respect because of the work that they do and the tough job that it is. But they should only earn our respect when they show respect not just to those who agree with their platform but more importantly to those who do not. Canadian politicians need to be leaders and as such…it is never about themselves.

Arrogance or rude and bullying behaviour have never been descriptors of high quality leaders. So let’s try and remove ourselves as far away as possible from Trump style politics and ensure nothing less from our politicians, to act with dignity and integrity and not with arrogance and a reality show mentality. We deserve that and quite frankly they should desire it too!

I had really hoped that through this pandemic the overall respect for what educators and systems do would improve. During out of class learning, there were more than enough parents who said something like, “I can’t keep up with my own 2 children, how do teachers do it with a class of 30?” I’m not sure whether that sentiment will continue on the positive path or instead only be fleeting.

Why? Why is so hard to convince the general public of the importance of educators?

For some, it is because they “think” they know what a teacher does since, they did go to school! They look at holidays or pay or workday or PD Days and believe that teachers have it pretty good. They choose the worst teacher they ever had and evaluate the entire teaching population based on that individual. Pretty easy to be negative! What they don’t see is behind the scenes, the hours of preparation and marking, the volunteer time and the stress of being responsible in many ways of raising someone else’s child. They also don’t see the glamour parts of the job like, cleaning up poop or being told to “F” off or being threatened by a bullying parent. No, they just think that teaching is a 8:30-3:30 job with weekends off and a lot of holidays!

Part of the issue is that teaching is experiential and unless you do it, you really don’t have a full understanding of the requirements. I would always forewarn new administrators coming right out of the classroom that what they thought administration was and what it was going to be like were very different. Most didn’t totally believe me, but they soon realized that administration like teaching was also experiential and, “You don’t know what you don’t know!” I always thought it was a great advantage for me as a superintendent to have taught from K-12, including Provincial Achievement Test grades and Diploma Exam subjects. So given that educational positions are so experiential, I think it will continue to be difficult to communicate what they do, to achieve a better understanding from the general public. So then how does education get the recognition is so richly deserves?

This is where I believe messaging counts both from an individual perspective and from teacher organizations. My daughter is a teacher and it gave me great pride that she chose the profession. However, I was dismayed at colleagues who thought she should choose a different profession because of the “state of education.” Do we really want to thwart our children’s passions because of the job is tough? It is not a good message to our own children and their friends that teaching isn’t highly regarded by us within the profession for a career. If we want the general public to have respect for educators then we must have the same respect for ourselves and clearly demonstrate that to our children and our students.

Have you ever been around a person that is always negative? It is not much fun! Pretty soon you either try to find a way to limit contact with that individual or simply go tone deaf. Unfortunately, we have those individuals in the profession too! Their constant whining that nothing is good enough or that the sky is always falling doesn’t provide much confidence in the system. There are people out there who are just waiting to shove the dagger in a little deeper and be able to say, “See educators are just whiners and certainly don’t deserve our respect and support!” Individual messaging counts!

Social media can be a breeding ground for negativity and especially now with this pandemic. While I’m sure that most people believe they are just advocating for themselves and their students, the negative overtones are front and center. Don’t get me wrong, there are still a far greater number of positive posts from teachers, but we know that most people will tend to gravitate to the negative if it is out there. I don’t know the exact line between advocating and complaining but somehow we need to bring forth more positive messages. Always try to advocate by telling the great things that are happening in the school or system rather than looking for something or someone to blame or to fault.

My point for individuals but especially for organizations is that the messaging can’t always be negative. You are not winning the battle if you consistently communicate that nothing is ever good enough. It would be most welcome if politicians, ALL POLITICIANS, led this movement to acknowledge strengths and good decisions rather than look for the negative and simply criticize everything on the other side.

When I was a superintendent, Alberta Education officials knew me pretty well as being a straight shooter. They knew that when decisions were made that supported student learning, I was their biggest fan. They also understood that when those decisions were contrary to what was best for students, staff and the system, I was their toughest critic. It would not have been unfair for me to only be their toughest critic when they deserved accolades too!

I would consider myself a liberal-minded conservative. I have not been pleased with some of decisions this government has made but I also wasn’t enamored by many of the decisions of the previous government. However, I can’t say enough good things about the work they did with curriculum. Contrary to popular thought, it wasn’t political in nature, it did have great stakeholder input and the timelines were very acceptable. I say this because even though I’m not a supporter of the previous government, they did some great work. All of their policies or decisions weren’t bad, in fact many of them were very strong. I’m guessing that when the dust settles, we will see that this government provided some positive outcomes as well.

The key point is that we can’t continually be negative and only look for things that are wrong and hope that our stature as a profession is elevated and ultimately the learning environment for our students is enhanced. Every decision made by a government or board, or educator can and likely should be scrutinized (ensuring you truly know all the facts and the context). However, if the comments on those decisions are only negative, then you’ve likely lost your ability to be objective and are missing your “fair” quotient! I don’t believe we should be silent, but in order to be a strong and successful advocate, it needs to be done without constantly pointing fingers and playing the blame game. Hint…eventually nobody listens to you!!!

As the saying goes, you will always attract more bees with honey than vinegar so, let’s use a little more honey going forward!

The start of school, typically in September has a couple of constants. First, everybody gets sick! We have a heightened awareness because of COVID 19, but let’s face it, students and staff often get sick during this first month of school. Students and staff have typically lost some of their immunity factors over the summer and the ramped up schedule for both tends to lead to more illness at home and at school.

The second constant for the school start is the critical importance of adults building strong relationships with students. This year, the need to foster effective and trusting relationships with students, parents and guardians is even greater. There continues to be a high level of anxiety out there, (some warranted and some not) and students first need to feel safe and supported in their learning environment. Media hysteria, social media rants or politically motivated misinformation about how schools are ill prepared don’t make it easy for educators in schools. The good news however is that compassionate educators always tend to push these distractions aside and focus on relationships.

Prior to the start of the school year I was invited to present to an elementary staff on school culture and relationships. With regular in-school attendance being interrupted for almost six months, the general public may believe that the 3 Rs: Reading, wRiting and aRithmetic should be the primary focus coming back into school. However, my contention then and now is that the 3Rs to be attended to are: Relationships! Relationships! Relationships!

Of interest, is that in many standards for teachers and leaders, the first competency is always around fostering effective relationships. Great teachers and great leaders always build strong relationships with their people…little or big! Yet the push from some governments and the general public is to elevate the standards usually by imposing unnecessary high stakes testing. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in constantly improving the educational experience of our students and I’m adamant that data should be used to inform our instructional practice. But higher standards or “better graduates” won’t come about if we don’t first focus on relationships. The issue is well characterized in the photo below.

Dr. Jody Carrington would be all over this slide because it speaks of connection and in essence, that is what strong relationships are…connections.

Why would teacher and leader standards have relationships as their first competency if it wasn’t that important? Every September should be the start or re-start of building relationships that carry on throughout the year. If we don’t get that right…then we really aren’t getting education right!!!

Some leaders are people first while others tend to be more policy driven. The very best can walk in both worlds quite easily but if a leader needs to choose, I would always suggest working on relationships. Many organizations and especially small school divisions were run like small “mom & pop” corner stores. There wasn’t much written down in terms of regulations and everybody just knew how things worked. Unfortunately our world has shifted so that those types of “laissez faire” operations have become almost non-existent. Employment rifts, poor relationships between management and employees and a litigation happy society has created this outcome. And sometimes, rules are required to be made because of “stupid” decisions of staff.

I’m not against policies and regulations and during my time as a Superintendent of Schools, I needed to establish some strict directives and make some tough decisions. I agonized over decisions about cancelling some trips that I knew were of great benefit for students but also knew that their safety was in potential jeopardy. I never wanted to be known as the superintendent who bankrupted the division because of a poor decision around policy. There is always a fine balance between people first and policy first and honestly, sometimes I got it right and sometimes I didn’t. But one thing I learned through my many years in leadership, it is pretty easy to judge that line when you’re in the cheap seats and have no skin in the game.

There are rules that are clearly defined, very specific and there is no other way than “this or that.” Anything involving money is pretty specific and as example after example shows, even nice people commit fraud if you don’t have tight controls. However, not all policy is or should be “black or white.” One of the things I always looked for in any policy or regulation was the gray area. Laws should never be broken but policies should be adaptive enough to have some breathing room. Your best leaders, those who lead with compassion and not simply “by the book” will always look at the intent of the policy and how its application will create a win-win scenario for both management and employee. Policies should never be to advantage one side or the other but rather be a guide for appropriate and acceptable decisions, and actions. Too often they are used as a hammer to curb usually a small percentage of rogue employees. While that saddens me to write that sentence, I know it is true because every organization has rogue employees or leaders who lack compassion and proper relationship building skills.

In the next couple of weeks, schools are going to be open for business and there is going to be a strong requirement for compliance reporting. We are still in the midst of a pandemic and if you think the paperwork was excessive for occupational health and safety standards this will be worse. School personnel will be required to keep accurate records to ensure the safety of students and staff. It is going to be another task placed on an already full plate! Make no mistake, this requirement is critical going forward and cannot be seen as just another hoop to jump through. Frustrating as it is, school divisions, governments and more importantly departments of health need this very accurate information to limit widespread infections.

Here is my point- divisional staff and government officials need to be patient with school personnel. There are a lot of moving parts in a school and…

Policies and regulations need to be relaxed or at the very least the “gray” found so that the most important aspects of schooling can be accomplished. Every report is not critical, every task is not essential but the health and well being of staff and students is!!! You want massive sick leave…keep piling on the non-essential reports or other tasks that in the grand scheme of things make your life as a manager easier but theirs as employees, not so much! That is why, especially in this time of pandemic, don’t forget about your own people and therefore lead with people in mind first!

It has been quite awhile since I’ve put my words down, but I’ve thought about this next message since last week. Why? Well last week, a good friend of our son, committed suicide. While there is great sadness when anyone takes his or her own life, some suicides seem to be more uncharacteristic than others. This one was very shocking because quite honestly, there never seemed to be any visible signs of internal struggle. This young man, appeared to have everything going for him, was always the life of the party and a comedian extraordinaire.

I’ve watched the disbelief in my son and his friends’ words and actions. That guilt question is always close to the surface, “Why didn’t I see it coming?” And, like with many tragic deaths, the “what ifs” start to spin out of control. Everybody wants an answer in order to make sense of why this young man would take his own life and yet there will never be any one that is satisfactory. He was hurting inside and nobody, neither family nor friends, knew how much and to what degree. And that is why this one was so shocking.

Being in education, it would be rare not to have been impacted by a student (present or past) suicide. Some may be more suspected”expected” than others, but all our tragic. It is difficult for me to imagine a person facing so much despair and feeling so alone that the only decision is suicide. Maybe that’s part of the problem… I, and like many don’t seem to understand that silent despair or more importantly choose not to be willing to understand it and instead continue to “sweep those issues under the table” because it is easier! Let’s just not talk about depression or anxiety or any other mental health challenge. For us it may be easier but for those suffering in silence, NEVER!

The fact of the matter is that death by suicide occurs far too often and is more prevalent in men.

The challenges around speaking up about mental health issues continues to exist in our society. We’ve made some great strides in supporting mental health in the last number of years but there is still so much more to be done. There remains a shroud of taboo when mental health issues are discussed, especially for males. This is where as a society we have to do better and stop accepting the “man up” approach to problems. Silence is not golden in this situation and in fact exacerbates the problem.

Depression, anxiety or any other mental health issue are real for people and need to be brought to the forefront and not kept deep inside or masked behind other “socially acceptable traits.” It is important that we build great resilience in our children and young adults but also help them understand and more importantly fully welcome a sense of vulnerability. This is not simply on parents but rather on all of us to build a more gentle and kind society. Suicide rates, especially for males will continue to increase without our intervention.

I feel great sorrow for this young man’s family and friends and my own heart aches for our son. One suicidal death to one too many and so we must do better.

If you are that person struggling, don’t keep it inside or mask it with other emotions but instead open up and find someone who you can share your issues with. And if you are that person who is the friendly ear, listen, don’t judge and assist in accessing the help required. Be kind, be gentle and simply be there! Even one suicide prevented is worth it!